Friends show their love in times of trouble, not in happiness; Euripides
Close Friend Support: One of my closest and most supportive friends is leaving to go overseas with her family. It’s only for six months, but still. It has caused me to reflect on our close friendship and what it means to me as I prepare to say our goodbyes.
We would not have met if it wasn’t for Autism. She was one of the first ‘Autism Mum’s’ I met. I can remember how, in the early days, I was so in awe of the parents who had been doing this for longer than me. Their stories filled me with hope and helped me look beyond the label. It also made you realise that there is a future. And it is not one that is full of meltdowns and challenges. It was such a source of support for me.
One of the biggest pieces of advice I can give other parents who are just embarking on their journey as a ‘special needs parent’ is to find other parents in a similar situation. These are the ones who just ‘get it’ and there is no judgement. It is important. In the early days after my eldest was diagnosed it was my way of staying sane, and learning to take it one day at a time. In fact, because it was difficult to leave the house (I also had a two year old) it was actually FaceBook that was my saviour. In select, supportive groups I could ask questions and there was always someone who would post a helpful response. This helped get me through some really challenging days.
My friend is someone that I can ask about anything, and she will always give me her honest opinion. Sometimes you don’t want it sugar coated and you need to have someone in your life who you can talk with about the hard stuff – the things that are really important. The support of close friends is crucial to your well-being. Anyone with a child with additional needs knows that time is precious, and I’m not one for making small talk. There are plenty of other people who talk about the weather.
I will miss my friend dearly. But so long as there is internet, we will remain connected and I’m sure our friendship will endure the distance that physically separates us. I look forward to her return where we can have a good catch up over a cuppa. And I can guarantee you that we won’t be talking about the weather.