Setting Goals
Setting Goals|Liflelong Pathways
Setting goals: I was so fortunate to attend the Community Living Project Inc. retreat for 2016. This was all about setting goals for the person with disability in our family.
Sometimes we are so focussed on the destination. It is critical to think about the goals for the journey. If you are goal driven you will always reach your destination. The destination may, however, change a little from what you originally thought, but if you get there as a result of achieving the goals then it is the right destination.
I thought the following analogy demonstrated that really well. If Henry Ford had asked people what they wanted, they would have said faster horses. The people were focussed on the destination of how to get somewhere faster. Ford, however, thought about the goal of how do we improve transport. If he had listened to the consumers, he would never have changed the transport industry.
Part of looking towards the future is to have a vision. Having a clear vision about the kind of life you want for yourself, or a family member, is important. Dare to dream of new and exciting possibilities. You can “imagine better”. Imagine what is possible before you can see or feel it. For example, you may know that you want your child to attend a mainstream school, not a special school.
So often when looking at goals and the future, a person’s disability is at the centre of this focus. It is vital that you take disability out of the equation when you are developing your vision . You need to think ordinary. That is, to think of what is ordinary, what everyone else does. It is also critical that you have high expectations. All too often people with disability are assumed to be less capable than they actually are; there are low expectations of them. The clearer your vision is, the easier it is to plan. The vision acts as a compass and keeps you on the right direction – it’s an overarching map.
But where do you start? The process of setting goals and preparing visions can be daunting and overwhelming; sometimes you can’t think about tomorrow let alone years into the future. Start with where you want to be; “Let not our needs determine our dreams but our dreams determine our needs.”
Don’t confuse your path with your destination. Just because it’s stormy now doesn’t mean you aren’t headed for sunshine. We all know pathways are full of bends and speed bumps. The challenges faced when working towards the goals that we have set can only serve to strengthen our resolve to achieve them – if we let them. The stormy times around setting goals will happen, and the goals will change over time. The main thing is that you set goals, otherwise you don’t know what destination you will reach – it may turn out to be one that you didn’t want. Being fully included in a mainstream activity can be challenging. The benefits will be tremendous. Hence, the destination is the mainstream activity and not being segregated from your community. It need not matter what the exact activity is, so long as you are a part of it and not just on the periphery.
‘The best way to predict the future is to create it’ – Abraham Lincoln.
A good deal of the weekend at the CLP retreat was dedicated to setting goals for the transition of a person with disability to their NDIS plans. This was really timely for me. My sons’ plans were up for their annual review in a couple of weeks and I was able to apply what I had learnt in the workshop. A parent ally, my neighbour Heather (our photo is above), joined me on the retreat. It was wonderful to have someone else’s input into setting goals for my boys. We planned some community minded goals where we can go on bike rides together and spend more time together as families.
Retreats are vital for those in a caring role. If you don’t take the time to recharge and unwind, you become compromised in your caring role. I thoroughly enjoyed my time at the retreat. It was held in such a beautiful setting; The Monastery, Parish of St Paul of the Cross, in Glen Osmond. On breaks I enjoyed wandering through the garden, and this is where I stumbled across this old pathway. It has remained unchanged since the monastery was build in 1896. I loved the experience of walking along it. I was reminded of how grateful I am to the people who have walked a similar path before me. Their courage around setting goals for the person with disability in their family has caused changes that have enabled my sons to have a good life, an inclusive life, an ordinary life.
For more information on the Community Living Project, please refer to their website: